Thursday, November 15, 2012

On a Ventilator? Seriously?! :D


Are you on your deathbed Sir?
I heard that you’re dying of old age. Please, Sir please tell me this is not true because if it is, then I swear Bombay will burn. Yes, Bombay will burn, bhaiyyas will be beaten up, we’ll throw out some Muslims & Madrasis, molest some women and tear down a couple of Archies’ and McDonald’s for good measure.
I cannot believe it, Sir! It seems like it was only yesterday that you set Bombay on fire with your fiercely communal speeches. I was a kid back in ‘92 and I thoroughly enjoyed all the holidays that I got because of your frequent bandhs (My father used to grumble about missing office though!) Not me. I revered you for bringing out the bile in the poor, working class people. Your opposition to the Valentines’ day celebration on grounds that it was poisoning our minds was legendary too!
And of course who can forget your act of transforming the city of maximum debauchery, Sins and Migrants to a cultural hotbed of jingoism, narrow mindedness & hatred by simply renaming it! You speeches were so awesome. You used to mimic your rivals in such a wicked manner. You pointed out the flaws in the ruling party so well. It’s a different matter that you never said what you’d do if elected. I still loved your speeches. I used to envision an India under your rule and I used to shudder sorry, I used to get goose bumps!
I’ll miss you so much. I made a living out of hating you and making fun of you. If you die you’ll be relegated to a second grade portrait in future SS gatherings.
I so wish you live another five years! Your health is so poor that you cannot threaten the Pakistani team anymore if they come to play in Bombay. Or threaten me for using the forbidden ‘B’ word. It’s such a pity that you cannot enjoy the millions and zillions which you too, embezzled.

I’d humbly request you to slog it out for another five years. So that your party does not come to power on votes given out of sympathy. You can then watch the wretch you call a son squander all your ‘good’ work. Besides, it’d be easier to believe in God if he extends your miserable life.
I know you have only hours if not weeks left.. but I sincerely hope.. pray that your misery continues..

Yours lovingly,
A gleeful Indian

8 Grumblings:

Siddhesh said...

Sorry but only Marathi's who have gone through the thick and thins of 1960's,70's and early 80's can understand the real importance of the Tiger. Not we kids who have only recently know him through stupid news channels and biased papers.
And about your comment of mumbai burning in 92, dude you really gotto do some research. "Jinda they woh log jinmain halat badalneki himmat aur takat thi"
Jai Hind, Jai Maharashtra !!!

Siddhesh said...

"Jinda they woh log jinme halat badal neh ki himmat aur takat thi'
Dude you are really misinformed about this whole thing. You need to go back to that era when things were bad for marathi people in marathi land itself. only then can you appreciate all his deeds.

ketki said...

While I admire your writing skills, I don't quite agree with the ideology behind the write up...

Anyway, its good to have u back to blogging! :)

ayyo.... said...

Why disagree?? Death is quite an escape.. a divine gift.. 5 more years on the ventilator would have done him a world of good..!! :D :P

ayyo.... said...

There has been no 'thick and thins' for any community in particular. Problems faced by Marathis (Only Bombaywallas) are the same ones that Australians face. Why do you criticise them? We are the Bhaiyyas and Madrasis of the World.
The same issue is being harped over in Tamil Nadu, Bengal (Language), Karnataka (Anti Migrants) but they are really non Issues!

If he really fought for the rights of the Marathis, then why today, even after 45 years after the inception of the party do we still see the same struggle? Why, after so many years, do we have another party (MNS) that claims to do just the same? The reality is, that this is just stoking of the pride, the Language pride through passionate speeches. Ever wondered why do his speeches arouse anger in the Marathi manoos, why does he always spew venom about someone or the other and rarely does he make you weep tears of joy.. or praise someone..!! Because politics of hate is more powerful than the power of love!!

ayyo.... said...

As for the Mumbai burning part, He made Bombay burn!!
Ayodhya has been an issue since the 1860s. But the riots never touched Bombay. Even the partition riots, did not affect Bombay as majorly as it did affect Punjab or Bengal. Why, even the Gujarat riots did not spread to Bombay!
Bombay was above all this. Why did the demolition of the Mosque in UP cause a riot in Bombay? We are 86% Hindu and 11% Muslim. How can he claim to have 'saved' us from Muslims? We decimated them. Look at the casualty figures. Bombay burned. It resulted into the retaliatory 1993 serial blasts and numerous terror attacks on OUR city since then. it has divided our people irreparably. How can you support such a person and claim to talk about National Unity at the same time?

You are right. Usne badal diya humare shehar ko, humare logon ko. But not for the good. Bombay was a carefree spinster. Mumbai is an oppressed Afghani prostitute!

ketki said...


after the countless discussions that we have had, I don't think it'll be a great idea to get me started on this... :P

Siddhesh said...

Hahaha, i like ur last line!
But bro things were bad for marathi middleclass back then. There were hardly any marathi people in business, trade, all domination by Gujrathi's and marwaris. You will be amazed by the stories marathi business men from tht era share, like even renting a shop in gujju dominated area like laming ton road was very very tough. In whitecollar jobs, Educated south Indians were getting preference.Am not saying he moved a magic wand and everything changed, am just saying he gave some hope, some direction, some small steps which led to Marathi comeback. As for the Australian issue, or anywhere else, i am always in support of local people first. Then comes any other. That doesn't mean total domination , i mean only "Preference"...otherwise then why do we have reservation? Quotas? That is also a sign of 'preferential treatment' right?
For the riot part, i agree some acts were unwarranted, but somebody has to take a stand. Somebody has to dirty his hands.