Monday, March 2, 2009

You know you’re in Bombay when...

mumbai VT
1. When words like ‘Jaaneka’, ‘Aaneka’ , ‘Rukneka’ , ‘Maarneka’ are considered to be grammatically correct.
2. When it takes longer to get off from your house to the station than from one end of Mumbai to another by train.
3. When every cab and rickshaw driver makes small talk with you.
4. When 1BHK flats qualify as ancestral houses.
5. When your life revolves around bizarre numbers like 8:13 and 6:08.
6. A kitchen garden is usually 3 pots hung in a window.
7. When you can curse in three languages in the same sentence.
8. When you pay 6000 bucks as rent for a room the size of a walk-in closet and think it’s a steal.
9. When you know what day it is looking at the traffic. And if you are smarter, plan your route according to the day of the week.
10. When you call a stranger ‘boss’
"Boss, zara sambhalke, niche saman rakhela hai!"
11. When you have NO idea who your mayor is but know exactly where Amitabh lives.
12. You ask your friend to meet at 9:13 under indicator of platform number 4.
train station
13. When you ask for directions and everybody around you also tries to help you out.
14. When you can go into an Udupi restaurant and order Jain American Chopsuey Dosa.
15. When your friend/relative whom you have just dropped off at the Sahar Airport reaches Dubai before you return home.
16. When the rickshaw driver plays songs that you've never ever heard before!
17. When your train is approaching station and the person behind asks "Utarega kya??"
18. When you ask somebody for a place and he tells you the bus number to get there.
19. When you find people staring at you with a disgusting look if you are not running to catch the train.
20. When you are happy to spy a sliver of the beautiful sunset/sunrise outside your window, between two grey multi storied apartment complexes.
rainy day
21. When renting an apartment you find out that the 'building is vegetarian' and you can't bring non-vegetarian food.
22. When mama and mausi are male and female 4th class workers respectively.
23. Where the happiness on the faces of slum kids by the roadside never fails to astonish you and you thought your life was a struggle?
24. When you are travelling and yelling on your cellphone, "Abhi mein Dadar pahunch raha hoon!" and actually you haven’t yet crossed Byculla!
And the speaker in the train says, "Agla Station.... Byculla..... Next Station....... Byculla..... Pudheel Station.... Bhaikhala!!"
25. When you hate the guy/girl in front is walking slowly and mutter under your breath, “Garden main aayela hai kya?!”
26. When automatic vending machines have a sales person sitting next to it just to help you.
27. When you know what a ‘Baba’ suit and a ‘Baby’ suit are.
BMC

8 Grumblings:

ketki said...

first of all, great layout!
and boss, maan gaye! this is the best description of mumbai i've ever read!
bole to, apun ko ekdum mast laga!

ayyo.... said...

@Ketki
Thanks!! But it was largely inspired from an article of the same title.

Sikander Fayyaz Khan said...

Maza aa gaya parh kay... :D

Bombay comes across as a city filled with people who are brutally frank and straight forward...

I dunno how far that is true though.. :O

ayyo.... said...

@Siku
Bombay is a city where people wear their heart on their sleeve and don't have time for sweet talk. They will always be in a hurry.
Though it is true for most people, it is still a stereotype of the Mumbaikar augmented by movies and politicians.
But yes, people are helpful and you'll enjoy your sty here..! :)

Akash said...

Dubai connection and all eh?
And "utArega?" -- Kya? :P

Nice post! You know my feelings about Mumbai but yeah, I actually have felt most of what you wrote there during my stay there - all the way from the rikshawwala trying to make small talk, to me saying, "Bas pahuch raha hoon. Powai aa gaya", when I knew I was very far from the place!

@Sikander
It IS a city with such people - unlike all the other cities in India I'd say.

ayyo.... said...

@Akki
Finally!! :D
Yeah, utArega kya.. is correct..!
Dubai was just an example..! :P

Hehe.. Yeah, these things must've happened with everyone who have visited..!
The indicator wala thing was inspired from my sister.. bus number wala is something I noticed myself doing.. :)

And what to just told Sikander.. is the biggest compliment you ever paid to Bombay!! I've never loved you more..! :D :D

Akash said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Akash said...

Lol! :)
"Utrega kya" is correct! :P (Unless you meant something else!)

And no. The compliment stands, but my feelings about the city stand too! :P :P Heh Heh